I text my oils team at the end of every week to review our wins. They’re not always business related. In fact, they’re not often business related.

Several days this week, I was tempted to sit in bed & feel bad for myself. How often do I want to say I don’t have any wins and just call it a day?

Lisa helped me realize that – hello?! – I do have 7 published books and I am getting back to work on #8 (or 11 if you count the ones I haven’t published!) Many of my new friends didn’t even know I was a writer. I fall back on the fact I’m not great at marketing (there is a lot to unpack there about fear & imposter syndrome) but part of it is because I don’t own those wins. So let’s do it….

This week I’m trying to get back to a gym schedule after a few wonky weeks. It’s important for my mental & physical health, especially this time of year. I’m working on that new book. In fact… I brought a passage to my writers group about space pirates and vampires – and read it out loud!! This little introvert went went way out of my comfort zone and did a craft fair for my oils business with Stacy that was so much fun and super successful, even though I was terrified. I’m not a holiday person (bah humbug about covers it) but I’m trying to embrace the season by putting my own spin on it – which turns out to be high on service and haunted Christmas houses. Maybe most importantly, I’m working, always, on my internal dialogue and tuning out what other people think in order to tune in to my own self and intuition. It’s not easy, but I am learning to trust myself after – well, to be honest, sh*tting on myself for a long time. I don’t have any advice there except I’m trying to lead by example, even when it’s hard. And it’s hard to own your struggles publicly, but if you’re going to own your struggles you should own your wins, too.

What were your wins this week?


Sometimes I wonder if all these blogs I write about my struggles is setting me in the wrong direction. That by staying with the pain – sharing it, even – I’m prolonging it. Wallowing. And I am not a wallower. I’m a person who looks for solutions. And if sharing these helps me find a solution, or helps anyone else know they’re not alone in this journey, then I’ll consider my writing a success.

But it’s not catching fire.

I don’t mean that in the conventional success way – although, let’s be honest, conventional success is as good of a bar as any. The fact that people read your words is a good indication that you have skills or talent or value. All those things I’ve been chasing. Even if people are criticizing you, they’re talking about you, right?

I don’t know that I want to go viral. But I want to know I matter. And how much do you matter when you have a small audience? Helping one person is enough, that’s for sure. But you can do so much more from the top than you can from the bottom. And I have big dreams.

or writer!

I’m a political junkie, I always have been. One thing I love about elections is that you can feel when a candidate is going to win. You can feel that momentum wash over everything like a wave, and it’s so exciting and addictive. The same can be said about success in any industry. I’ve read books from indie authors I knew were going to make it big (Colleen Hoover comes to mind). I’ve watched author and reader groups balloon in size with this momentum. I’ve seen content creators explode. It’s magic, but it’s the kind of magic you can’t bottle. What’s the secret?

It’s not always based on talent. It’s not always based on confidence or extraversion (although that sure doesn’t hurt.) How do I find this momentum in my life? How do I find my me-mentum??

I don’t know the answer, but I think a lot of it has to do with knowing what you want, and showing up for it. Zig Ziglar said success is the place where preparation and opportunity meet. I can’t always control opportunity, but I can control prep. I can show up, even (especially) when it’s hard and I don’t think I’m going anywhere. I can control my focus. I can control my commitment and the work I put in, even if I can’t control how other people receive it. Maybe me-mentum is like a ball rolling down a hill? Maybe it doesn’t feel like much for the first couple rolls (or years) but when it catches fire, it goes up fast. Maybe I just need to be ready to catch fire? Primed.

I know I won’t have me-mentum if I keep changing direction every time the wind blows. I know I won’t have it if I stop doing the things I love because someone, sometime told me I’m not good enough. Maybe that someone was a top agent or editor, or maybe that someone was a really close friend or family member and it cut deeply. Maybe both. I might never catch fire, but I’ll never know if I don’t keep going.

I wish I knew how much prep was enough, how many times I’d have to show up before I know, truly, this is what I want and where I’m in alignment. Like me-mentum, you can feel alignment, and with enough of those moments, maybe I’ll be ready to catch fire.

Come on in, I’m ready!

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